my brothers

I have these sweet brothers:
Benny - sexes confusion. He thinks I am a boy and I think he is a girl. Because he does these little things with his stuffed animals in his car.
Cyrus - heart break kid. Talking about love, he can go endless and so enjoy in it. Sometimes I think he is more girlish than I do.
Derek - unpredictable thinker. He is a performer level pianist, but his car only has real bad quality chinese pop mp3s (the radio version kind).
Fung - everything counsellor. Anything screwed, I can go to him.
Glen - mr. put-you-down. No matter what have I achieved, he can think of something to say to put me down and kill my mood (like totally kill).
Kenchi - sweet talker. His new year resolution is to burn the airport because he doesn't want me to go back to hk.

In sum, everyone of us has our own weird ways. *and I think I have the most. lolz.* But this is also one of the reasons why we are so connected.

a little update

Oh I haven't blog for sometime already. Life is perfectly balanced between relax & busy. Got stuffs to do, but no hurry... moving well as I've planned. I really love my new, and last school term. I enjoy going to classes and learning new things. Few little new things have really cheered me up recently:
1. Volunteering at disability help service on campus. I am responsible for taking notes for a disabled student in a sociology class.
2. Working for JMC's promotional video. I gotta interview ppl and involve in part of the production of the video. The thing will be shown in all Chinese aliance church across Canada. So it's kinda pressuring. But brothers and sisters help me a lot in the interviews, equipments and production, which let me experience God's grace once again.
3. Working well with the community news in hybrid worship with jen. Both of us are surprised by the great feed backs from brothers and sisters, and they actually remeber the topics dat we have done in the past year. That is so cool. And serving with jen is always great; besides the working, we discuss and talk about the issues and learn from each other.
4. The resturcture of church's music department is giving POF a larger and further vision. At first, I am all negative about the change and I only wanna remain a small potato in 3360. But after talking to Cyrus, I think I have a problem with my serving attitude. He is right, I think I gotta learn to be submissive to God's lead. And I am still seeking my direction now.
I can go on and on. But I gotta stop here.

Ding Ding & Don Don

Ding Ding is a name dat a group of his friends usually call me. Actually, he started this name first as he announced to his friends that he was in love with me. He said, "I have found ding ding." Found, like I am supposed to be his, but I was lost; and then, he found me. Are we a pair dat God has planned? It's still unknown to me. Although we have been together for 2 years, I am still uncertain about considering him as a real long run. God has never obviously shown me dat he is the right guy. In fact, I only asked Him once or twice. Becoz I think dat even He gives me an answer, I will still wonder if dat is His final answer.
I guess I will be in the circle of wondering forever if I am not going to trust somebody. I am not sure about something, and I go to God. Then, I am uncertain about God's answer and I keep on wondering. I can imagine that I will be going round and round in my whole life. hmmm... this can be my new year resolution: in small and big matters, I should learn to give some trust to ppl and my heavenly Father.

girls' chat

I had a great night with two sisters tonite. We rarely have time to sit down and chat throughout a year. And tonight, we gathered around and talked about anything. Although we are so different in personalities and attitudes, we can share about everything about our life style, spirituality, points of view, burdens, struggles... countless topics. hahhaaa.
Previously, I found that family time is so treasurable for me now. It's also true that in-depth sharing time between friends are also very precious. As friends move away from toronto or/and driven to their careers and lovers, it's difficult to find a good timing and person to reveal my thoughts and feelings. Now, I come to realize that I am getting old (positively saying, I am growing up).

Hope or hopeless?

Tsunami had happened for more than a week. People talk about it every single day. But, I have never mention my view/feelings to anybody. Many emails, tv shows, radio broadcasting... media have overwhelmed me. Tons of suvivors' stories are reported each day. I am speakless about what I heard and read. I don't know why I react in this weird way. It's not that I have no feeling about it. Nonetheless, the hard feeling is not easy to express. My heart hurts whenever I hear or talk about the incident. And may be this is why I remain silent and don't want to talk about it until now.
This is not a headline like micheal jackson's trial. And I hate to see people discuss about it and analyze the situations, and sometimes predict some numbers. I can never understand how these ppl talk about it and update it with others every day. Doesn't it hurt when they talk about it? How can they tell the stories to different ppl in one day and report the updates on the next days and the follows? If it doesn't hurt the one who tell, it may hurt the one who listens. But, I see people still discuss about it many times each day. I have no clue.
Moreover, I can't stand how media have visualized the scenes. I don't mean it's a bad thing. But, how can media help by showing us the pictures of hundreds of dead bodies and crying women and children? I don't want to know about the tragedies anymore, it's enough. I want to know about hopes; in fact, I've already known where and what is hope. However, many ppl have never heard of it. Brothers and sisters, it's not only a time to ask ppl to donate and pray. It's even more important for us to tell them about the hope.

Happy New Year

2005 is going to be a critical and exciting year for me. In 2004, too many friends told me that once I've started working, the world will be so different. So, here I am, gonna explore the new world that I don't understand. hahhaaaa.
From the tsunami at the end of 04, I am especially thankful that my family and I are still healthy and good. Particularly for my mom, it has been almost 10 years when a tumor was first found in her brain. These years of good health, survival from cancer and the well emotional and financial status are precious. And the most unbelievable thing is that our whole family accepted Jesus Christ as our personal savior in the 2002, the year when my mom discovered brain cancer. In the coming year, I will treasure every moment with my family and friends. Life is more about "birth, age, sickness and death"; it's about _____.(I think only God knows how to fill in this blank.)