we were good friends

How did we came together?

-money?
-car pool?
-common interests?
-similar experiences?
-physical attractions?
-romance?
-care?
-love?
-God?

And how did we maintained?

-movies?
-bowling?
-internet?
-this blog?
-bubble tea?

Then, why are we distanted now?

-lack of maintaince?
-lack of sparkles?
-we changed? (in better wording: we grow up?)
-geographic distance?
-we simply move on to our realistic life?

Human beings' relationship is complicated sometimes; but, it is simple and silly as well. Because afterall, we are all shallow sinful men. So our relationship can be distructed easily by temptations, lies, gossips... and by ourselves.

Random thoughs at a sleepless night

The sky is narrow and wide.
My mind is empty and crowded.

What is heaven? What is life?
They're unreachable, but solid.

I am low but God is high.
True and false are not separated.

I want to write out my cry;
At the tip of my tonge, but shutted.

Speakless, only a long sigh;
Too many signs, but I'm too blinded.

Elsa

She was the teacher and mom;
and I was the student and daughter.
Even our barbies were good sisters.
Her dress was purple; and mine was pink.
We did pony tails for each other.
Some years later, we farewelled with tears.
Some years later, we greeted with tears again.

We met at the other side of the land;
and all of the lovely days were back.
She was in the chemistry and algebra.
and I was in the economics and computer.
Even our boyfriends were best friends.
Her jeans were white; and mine was black.
We lighted up the cigarette for each other.
Some days later, we farewalled with smiles.
Some days later, we will greet with smiles again.

worship vs. cooking

I have been leading the worship team for almost a year already. And I would like to share a secret with you here: I have been praying for the gift in music since the first day I joined the worship team. Almost after every single worships, I would ask God why were other sisters and brothers so talented. Sometimes, some of them may not be really skilled, but at least they had the muscial sense. However, I think I am the worst in the team. I have no sense and skill. Actually, I have no idea why God puts me in this place. But oh well, as Emman told me, God doesn't use talented ones, but the loyal ones. And since I really love leading worships, so I guess I will stick w/ it until my teammates can't stand with this no-musical-sense leader anymore. lol.
Why am I saying worship when the title is cooking?! Here you go: today, I had an expensive and yuckie lunch in school. All of a sudden, I felt very blessed that God gives me the talent to cook. And I think I have a pretty good cooking sense. I am not a follow-the-recipe cooking person. I know how to modify recipes, just like how my worship teammates know how to modify the musics and arrangements. When I was eating the lunch, I imagined what will I be like if I don't know how to cook... If God let me choose between musical talents and cooking talents, for sure I will pick cooking.
Basically, I think leading worship is kinda similar to cooking. In cooking, I can bring enjoyments to ppl of what God has provided us. In worships, I am able to lead people to rejoice in Him. Now I realize: if God makes me to bring people joy, then it doesn't matter if He gives me the talents in cooking or in music.
Now, I think I am more sure that God place me in worship team because of something. And, I will not ask God for the gift in musical skills anymore. I have came to realize more about why God makes me in certain ways. I've also learnt to believe in God's way of making and molding me. You know what, God is sooooo amazing. How can you imagine yourself discovering something about Him and His purpose of your life while eating a taste-not-too-good lunch? PTL~

$$$

Kenchi said that I am weird. Why should I feel bad about getting a new car and a new bowling ball? I don't really know why either.
I am never a good "manager", no matter time or money. I think the reason I am upset is that I am very bad in managing my money (which is God's money). Although going to bowling is not too expensive since we only play during the discounted hours, the expenses on bowling are like triple to what I offer. Also, God blesses me with the purchase of a new car, and I have chosen a nice model with some top features.
May be it doesn't seem like there is something wrong with all my decisions; becoz I did offer 1/10 every week and the car is actually a gift from my dad and my sister will also be driving it as well... so, am I not selfish? Am I right with buying these?
I think that every penny in my pocket belongs to God. The point is not how much do I offer to Him (well...the money is from God, He doesn't need us to offer Him). It matters with how much am I keeping for myself [to fulfill myself].

blessed fellowship

Yesterday after fellowship, almost all of us (danielians) went to buff to play + bbq. It was really fun. For a long long time, I haven't be so happy with the bro and sis. It's a different kind of happinese. It doesn't like camping or fellowship that we need to follow some instructions and some conditions to "fun". It's a joy of freedom!!
In the beach, we played until we got tired and totally soaked. Then, we just lay down on the sand, close our eyes and relax. When we were recharged after a while, we would run to the water again. Sometimes, even only sitting on the beach with few sisters, keeping quiet, occiasionally laughing at the brothers. All of those moments were pleasures. This is more about fellowship; it's a freedom that we embraced in God's creations together. I do not know how to express my joy and thanks. It's amazing.
In addition, after reading Jan's blog about ex-dan had a wonderful time in the first meeting in hk as well. Once again, I feel that Daniel fellowship is filled with God's blessings. Please continue to pray for Daniel & ex-Dan's growth.

I miss holiday

It's the end of summer for everybody, but it's actually the beginning for me. My summer holidays started last Friday and will end next wednesday. These few days, I did nothing but being a lazy bone. I don't feel relaxing or what at all. Instead, I just feel sleepy all the time. You know, sometimes when you are so into the lazy mode, your brain is like totally blank. I tried to write something, read something, fix something, clean something... But I end up doing nothing. I think I have gone too far. I even lost my interests in reading, writing and cooking. For the first time in my life, I feel dat I hate holidays.
Instead, during the busy days, with school, work & serving, when I can squeeze out an afternoon or a night to make my favourite recipe or reading my favourite book for the 10th time, that's awesome! That's exactly what is called holiday. *argh* I miss holidays when I am in holidays.